"Wendy did it!"

The other reasons:

1. If we are going to feed another mouth, it might as well be a human's.

2. We've got enough potty training to do.

3. Don't want to find a pet sitter when we go on vacation.

4. We already have a security system.

5. The kid's haven't asked for one.

6. We'd have to fence our yard in (for a dog.)

7. I don't want to be forced to exercise at 6am (or at all for that matter.)

8. Our house already stinks enough.